It’s been awhile since I posted, and since then I have passed my six month bandiversary (January 22nd, 2010).
There are a few milestones I would like to mention:
- 85 pounds down
- Reached Onderland (198 pounds at the moment)
- I now wear XL shirts and 16 pants
- The compliments have been ongoing and very nice.
I got a fill on January 11th and it’s been rough a little. I had a few stuck episodes which led to me to not eat very much. Eating was simply too painful so I began munching here and there, not really eating many calories, certainly not enough to live a normal healthy life. Last week I began feeling dizzy and I almost fainted in the lunch room. I finally had a long conversation with my best friend, who is also banded, and concluded that I need to eat more.
Since then, I’ve been on routine of eating frequently, and making good choices. I have a bunch of snacks at my desk and I feel much better.
My friend is 5 years out and has been so helpful in providing me tips on how to feed your body properly. I truly thank her for my success. She mentally prepared me for this for 3 years, so I jumped in having a good idea of what I was getting into.
This surgery is a very slippery slope. My band is tight to the point where I never get hungry and always feel full; therefore forgetting to eat is much too easy. I’m happy this happened to me (the fainting spells) because it made me realize a few things, how this is not a race and how taking care of my body is the most important part of the whole journey.
My next fill is scheduled for February 15th, 2010. At this moment I don’t need more restriction but this may change once I get there depending on how much I loose.
It’s been a very rocky six months but I do not regret this surgery. I love my band. It helps me stay in control with my eating, something I had never been able to do before. I still get to enjoy my favorite foods (cheese, chocolate milk, chocolate, chips) but in moderation and I really needed that. Portions were one of my big problems. I had mini eggs (MY FAVORITES) last night and I enjoyed it. I like being able to cheat every once awhile without the guilt.
It’s been quite the journey, but I have changed so much since my surgery. I now dress like I want to dress, care about my hair, put makeup on, etc. Before surgery, I lacked self esteem and thought I was ugly so I didn’t see the point of even trying to look half decent. Now everyday I make an effort to look my best.
My mind still hasn’t caught up with my body. Sometimes when I take a bath, I look at my legs and get amazed at how small they are. I went to Old Navy over the weekend and was shocked to have bought 2 shifts XL and a pair of Jeans there. It took a lot of courage to go try on these clothes, because in the back of my mind I thought they wouldn’t fit and I would leave empty handed but instead I left with $75.00 gone from my bank account.
This surgery is expensive clothing wise. Clothes only last a few weeks and then you notice you could fit into a smaller size. I HATE wearing clothes that are too big so I am always shopping. When I am wearing clothes that are too big, I feel my self esteem going down and I don’t want that to happen.
My next goal is the big one, the final goal. I am still unsure of where I want my ideal weight to be. I am hoping to reach somewhere from 145-150 so I can have a BMI of 25 which means I still have another 50 pounds to lose. It still sounds like a lot in my mind but I know I’ll make it.
I’m aiming for my one year bandiversary, July 22nd, 2010. I think six months is reasonable to lose 50 pounds. A lot of people tell me I don’t need to lose anymore, or that the point is not to get to a normal BMI, but when I had this surgery, I had it to go all the way.
In 2005, I made it to 186 pounds and gave up and gained everything back. This time I am not settling for the bronze or silver, I’m going for the gold!
The truth is that this journey is for life, because even when I reach the gold, it won’t be over. Maintenance is a whole different ballgame and I have to accept the fact that no matter what, I will always have to monitor my weight no matter what. I will never be those people who can eat whatever and not gain.
M
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There are a few milestones I would like to mention:
- 85 pounds down
- Reached Onderland (198 pounds at the moment)
- I now wear XL shirts and 16 pants
- The compliments have been ongoing and very nice.
I got a fill on January 11th and it’s been rough a little. I had a few stuck episodes which led to me to not eat very much. Eating was simply too painful so I began munching here and there, not really eating many calories, certainly not enough to live a normal healthy life. Last week I began feeling dizzy and I almost fainted in the lunch room. I finally had a long conversation with my best friend, who is also banded, and concluded that I need to eat more.
Since then, I’ve been on routine of eating frequently, and making good choices. I have a bunch of snacks at my desk and I feel much better.
My friend is 5 years out and has been so helpful in providing me tips on how to feed your body properly. I truly thank her for my success. She mentally prepared me for this for 3 years, so I jumped in having a good idea of what I was getting into.
This surgery is a very slippery slope. My band is tight to the point where I never get hungry and always feel full; therefore forgetting to eat is much too easy. I’m happy this happened to me (the fainting spells) because it made me realize a few things, how this is not a race and how taking care of my body is the most important part of the whole journey.
My next fill is scheduled for February 15th, 2010. At this moment I don’t need more restriction but this may change once I get there depending on how much I loose.
It’s been a very rocky six months but I do not regret this surgery. I love my band. It helps me stay in control with my eating, something I had never been able to do before. I still get to enjoy my favorite foods (cheese, chocolate milk, chocolate, chips) but in moderation and I really needed that. Portions were one of my big problems. I had mini eggs (MY FAVORITES) last night and I enjoyed it. I like being able to cheat every once awhile without the guilt.
It’s been quite the journey, but I have changed so much since my surgery. I now dress like I want to dress, care about my hair, put makeup on, etc. Before surgery, I lacked self esteem and thought I was ugly so I didn’t see the point of even trying to look half decent. Now everyday I make an effort to look my best.
My mind still hasn’t caught up with my body. Sometimes when I take a bath, I look at my legs and get amazed at how small they are. I went to Old Navy over the weekend and was shocked to have bought 2 shifts XL and a pair of Jeans there. It took a lot of courage to go try on these clothes, because in the back of my mind I thought they wouldn’t fit and I would leave empty handed but instead I left with $75.00 gone from my bank account.
This surgery is expensive clothing wise. Clothes only last a few weeks and then you notice you could fit into a smaller size. I HATE wearing clothes that are too big so I am always shopping. When I am wearing clothes that are too big, I feel my self esteem going down and I don’t want that to happen.
My next goal is the big one, the final goal. I am still unsure of where I want my ideal weight to be. I am hoping to reach somewhere from 145-150 so I can have a BMI of 25 which means I still have another 50 pounds to lose. It still sounds like a lot in my mind but I know I’ll make it.
I’m aiming for my one year bandiversary, July 22nd, 2010. I think six months is reasonable to lose 50 pounds. A lot of people tell me I don’t need to lose anymore, or that the point is not to get to a normal BMI, but when I had this surgery, I had it to go all the way.
In 2005, I made it to 186 pounds and gave up and gained everything back. This time I am not settling for the bronze or silver, I’m going for the gold!
The truth is that this journey is for life, because even when I reach the gold, it won’t be over. Maintenance is a whole different ballgame and I have to accept the fact that no matter what, I will always have to monitor my weight no matter what. I will never be those people who can eat whatever and not gain.
M
